Sex And Black Tape

Tom and Ray have made jokes about car owners solving their problems with a small piece of black tape… strategically placed over the check-engine light on the dashboard!

Of course, a piece of black tape doesn’t solve anything at all; it simply puts the warning out of view.  The check-engine light is there for a good reason, and there are lots of sensors connected to it that will make it come on.  Some problems – if ignored long enough – could seriously damage the engine or leave you stranded.

Our life and relationships don’t have a check-engine light per se, but there are certainly indicators about whether they’re functioning well or it’s time for some maintenance.  One of those indicators is our sexuality.

While there is a wide range of what’s “normal” in the way of sex drive, changes in your sex drive or arousal response could be sending you a message.  Sometimes, it’s easy to pinpoint and fairly easy to correct.  For example, loss of sex drive is a common side-effect of certain medications.  But various illnesses can also cause low libido.

For men, there are a number of things that can cause erectile dysfunction, ranging from simple things like stress or andropause to serious things like diabetes or other health problems.   A weak willy is not something to be ignored.

For women, it’s more complicated.  In stable relationships, many women experience a gradual decrease in their sex drive after 2-5 years, so it’s not necessarily a problem.  But an aversion to sexual interactions is a different story.

If your sex life isn’t what it used to be or isn’t what you’d like it to be, it’s time to “play detective” and look for the reasons.  If it’s been a few years since your last medical checkup, make the appointment.  And have a look at your your relationships – your relationship with your partner and your relationship with your own body – to see if they need a tune-up.

Remember, if your sexual check-engine light is coming on, a piece of black tape is not the solution!

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